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                 SUICIDAL THOUGHT? READ THIS ONCE.

Dr Suhaib Ashraf Bhat
Thinking positively of Allah swt, means: believing in what is appropriate to Allah swt, of names, attributes and actions; believing in the great impact that they have on His creation, such as believing that Allah swt, bestows mercy on those who deserve it, and pardons them if they repent and turn to Him, and He accepts their deeds of obedience and worship; believing that Allah swt has great wisdom in all that He wills and decrees.

Do not be sad, because sadness cause you to regret the past, to have misgivings concerning the future and to make you waste away your present. Do not be sad because grief cannot return the one that is lost or is gone away. Have faith, Give your life a second chance. Keep your eyes open. Lost will be replaced with something best. See upon you the signs of blessing, How many have been deprived of that which we already have? Lock your blessing up and keep them safe by being thankful.

Past is gone, future is unseen, so all you have is present. Are you the one who created human? Are you the one who grants them provision? Are you the one who is taking care of their needs?

No, it is Allah swt, Who does all that, Who is more merciful towards them than you are. Have complete trust that Allah swt will never cause them to be lost, may He be glorified and praised. This matter is not up to us at all. If all the people thought in this way no one would have any peace of mind. But praise be to Allah swt Who has guaranteed provision for everyone. Allah swt says (interpretation of the meaning):

“And no moving (living) creature is there on earth but its provision is due from Allah swt. And He knows its dwelling place and its deposit (in the uterus or grave). All is in a Clear Book (Al‑Lawh Al‑Mahfooz — the Book of Decrees with Allah swt)” [Hood 11:6]

So cast these thoughts away from your mind.

Maybe you have a day coming up that will be your first free day in a long time, and you want to make the most of it. Maybe you’re thinking about those days you wake up and feel weirdly present, happy about the sunshine, singing to yourself, and want to know how to have more of them. Let today be the day you let go of worries and embrace pleasure and contemplation. Let go of yourself, get lost, slow down, and enjoy the moment. The one who seeks happiness and success in this world has to have a balanced approach without letting the one outweigh the other. In this manner he can strengthen his heart with faith and find peace of mind in doing that which he is required to do. You know that death is an inevitable reality that will come to every living thing, and no one will be spared that, no matter how noble his status before Allah swt. Allah swt said to His Prophet, the noblest of all creation (interpretation of the meaning):

“Verily, you (O Muhammad) will die, and verily, they (too) will die”

[al-Zumar 39:30]

And Allah swt says (interpretation of the meaning):

“Everyone shall taste death. And only on the Day of Resurrection shall you be paid your wages in full. And whoever is removed away from the Fire and admitted to Paradise, he indeed is successful. The life of this world is only the enjoyment of deception (a deceiving thing)” [Aal ‘Imraan 3:185]

And the poet said:
Every son of a female, no matter how long he lives, Will one day be carried on the bier.

Always putting your trust in Allah swt in all your affairs, and knowing that this trust (tawakkul) will ward off the whispers of the Shaytaan and put an end to them. Once you have resolved to do that, then do not look back. If you feel that these whispers are overwhelming you again, then turn to Allah swt and seek refuge in Him. Allah swt says (interpretation of the meaning):

“And if an evil whisper comes to you from Shaytaan (Satan), then seek refuge with Allah swt. Verily, He is All-Hearer, All-Knower” [al-A’raaf 7:200]

Lift your head high and look forward; start your daily life with steadfastness and certainty, and approach all your actions with energy and peace of mind. How many good things there are in this world that fill hearts with contentment and tranquillity and fill the heart with hope and certain faith.
You can be alone in public or privately alone, but take some solitary time. If most of your solitary time is spent a certain way, find another way to spend it. For instance, if you work from home, go somewhere else to be alone. Visit a library, a museum, or take yourself out to lunch.
Spend time away from your phone and your computer. Forgetting your ordinary obligations will help you live in the moment. Choose to move on from feelings of resentment. Nothing takes you away from the present like dwelling in the past. To clear your day of resentment, make a list of people who have hurt you, or, if there is one person strongly on your mind, write only that name. Spend some time thinking about how much they hurt you, and what effect that has had on you.

We choose our joys and sorrows long before we experience them, He said,
The happiest of all people is he who has a sincere heart, a patient body, and contentment with what he possesses. I replied.

Most important thing here is to remember, In the period of sufferings real character of the people are revealed and exposed. The masks are down while the ugly faces are open to humanity as whole but don’t forget “No sadness goes on and No joy lasts forever”. You can be damn sure that the people who are there for you when you most need help are the ones that really do love you. It’s easy to love someone when they’re happy and breezing through life. It’s more difficult when that person is so stuck in pain they barely have any love to give. Remember that the people who really, truly, unconditionally love you, will still have love to give to you, even if you’re temporarily unable to give it back. Secondly, struggle doesn’t make you who you are as much as it tends to reveal who you are. When you’re truly in a state of desperation to fix something, your real self will start to emerge out of necessity. Pay attention to this. There are great lessons to be learned from seeing what you do and who you are in the most trying times.

To live for today, focus on what you have. Appreciate the things that make each day yours. When someone does something you appreciate, thank them. Let everyone you love know one thing you love about them. Make a list of things you are grateful for, and share it with those you love.
If something happens in your day that you appreciate, write it down, title it, and include as much detail as you can, including how it came to be and how it made you feel. Take the opportunities given to you today, whether they be invitations from friends or samples at the grocery store. Don’t do anything that makes you feel truly wrong, but do encourage yourself to try new things. Say “yes” to more than you usually do, and you might surprise yourself.
Set short-term goals that are connected to the bigger picture of what you ultimately want in life and who you want to become. These will impact what you do in the day to day.

Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen (may Allah swt have mercy on him) was asked:

Can a believer become mentally ill? What is the treatment for that according to sharee’ah? Please note that modern medicine treats these illnesses with modern medicines only.

He replied:

Undoubtedly a person may suffer from psychological or mental diseases, such as anxiety about the future and regret for the past. Psychological diseases affect the body more than physical diseases affect it. Treating these diseases by means of the things prescribed in sharee’ah – i.e., ruqyah – is more effective than treating them with physical medicines, as is well known.

One of the means of treating them is mentioned in the saheeh hadeeth from Ibn Mas’ood (may Allah swt be pleased with him): “There is no-one who is afflicted by distress and grief, and says: ‘Allaahumma inni ‘abduka ibn ‘abdika ibn amatika naasyati bi yadika, maada fiyya hukmuka, ‘adlun fiyya qadaa’uka. As’aluka bi kulli ismin huwa laka sammayta bihi nafsaka aw anzaltahu fi kitaabika aw ‘allamtahu ahadan min khalqika aw ista’tharta bihi fi ‘ilm il-ghayb ‘indaka an taj’al al-Qur’aana rabee’ qalbi wa noor sadri wa jalaa’ huzni wa dhihaab hammi (O Allaah, I am Your slave, son of Your slave, son of Your maidservant; my forelock is in Your hand, Your command over me is forever executed and Your decree over me is just. I ask You by every name belonging to You which You have named Yourself with, or revealed in Your Book, or You taught to any of Your creation, or You have preserved in the knowledge of the Unseen with You, that You make the Qur’aan the life of my heart and the light of my breast, and a departure for my sorrow and a release for my anxiety),’ but Allah swt will take away his distress and grief, and replace it with joy.” This is one of the remedies prescribed in sharee’ah.

“Our anxiety does not come from thinking about the future, but from wanting to control it.”. Kahlil Gibran.

Anxiety is often about not feeling our usual sense of control in life, and as the poet Kahlil Gibran suggests above, about getting stuck in our thoughts about the future.

I ask Allah swt to keep us safe and sound from worries and to relieve us of distress and anxiety, for He is the All-Hearing, Ever-Responsive, and He is the Ever-Living, Eternal. Aameen
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ONCE BEAUTIFUL; IS  BROKEN

By Vinod
I gave you my heart and my soul; you said it’s beautiful
We loved, cared and shared; it was beautiful
We talked for hours and ends; it was beautiful
You were always in my thoughts and mind – a glimpse of you made me shine; it was beautiful
When I looked into your eyes- I only saw love and light; it was beautiful
When you were in front – my heart stopped and mind went wild; it was beautiful

Time passed and love should strengthen;  but I see the intensity lessen
As you start distancing; my heart starts wrenching
As your love for me vanishes; my soul perishes 
My faith in love is shaken; still you are not mistaken  
Forever, you have my heart and my soul dearie
But Alas ! Our Love; Once Beautiful; Is Broken 

Who is he that will loan to the almighty Allah?

Dr Suhaib Ashraf Bhat
‘Who is he that will loan to Allah a beautiful loan which Allah will double unto his credit and multiply it many times?’ [2:245].

It is very important to start with the above verse that teaches us the importance of generously giving to the poor and needy. It help us to establish a better understanding of the psychological views that underlie charitable giving intention, that also plays an important role in the elicitation and stimulation of charitable giving behaviour. Islam, like other religions, enjoins its followers to ‘give’ for individual and societal well-being.
Charity contributes in preventing lots of diseases (to the one who gives it) and especially those related to blood pressure, tension, nervousness, diabetes, strokes, heart attacks, kidney failure and the likes. When a Muslim gives his charity, he feels psychological comfort and happiness. And this comfort and happiness is a reason to protect him from these diseases, Allah swt willingly.
Charity trains people to not get much attached to money, and this is important to those who risk their money in daily deals, bids and tenders.
Many of the diseases that affect human is due to envy, and when the patient gives his charity specially to people surrounding him from neighbours and relatives, charity eliminate envy (Allah swt willingly) and help cure the patient.
Since human behaviour entails good potentials and expressed capacity of mental, physical, and social activities, it will become obviously that Islamic spirituality plays a lively role in shaping the behaviour of the Muslims. Individual behaviour is a logical process where elements such as attitude, norms, and behavioural control influence individual. Indeed, Islam as a comprehensive way of life encompasses a complete moral system that is an important aspect of its world-view. We live in an age where good and evil are often looked at as relative concepts. Islam however, holds that moral positions are not relative, and instead, defines a universal standard by which actions may be deemed moral or immoral. Then good behaviour and good morals are a great worship in Islam.
The best among you are those who bring greatest benefits to many others. Charity preached by every religion of the world, is a way of bringing justice to society. And justice is the essence of religion, Islam has therefore made charity that is Zakah, obligatory and binding upon all those who embrace the faith; it has been made into an institution in order to give in permanence and regularity.
Being charitable and providing for the needy are important features of the Muslim character. Why is charity so important?
The existence of countless starving, poor, hungry and destitute Muslims and non-Muslims in the world points to the need for this essential teaching to be put into practice. Affluent Muslims may not realize how their wealth could strengthen whole communities. Giving charity correctly is crucial to both the well-being of the needy as well as the ultimate happiness of the wealthy. Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) emphasized this principle repeatedly.

The one who does not pay zakaah either believes that it is obligatory or he does not. If he does not believe that it is obligatory, then he is a kaafir according to the consensus of the Muslims, because he is denying something that no Muslim has any excuse for not knowing. If he believes that it is obligatory but he does not pay it because he is stingy, then he is not a kaafir according to the majority of scholars, but some of the scholars are of the view that he is a kaafir. 
Ibn Qudaamah (may Allah swt have mercy on him) said in al-Mughni (2/228): Whoever denies it out of ignorance, and he is ignorant of it because he is new in Islam or because he grew up in a remote area far from the cities, should be informed that it is obligatory and should not be regarded as a kaafir, because he is excused. But if he is a Muslim who grew up in a Muslim land where there are a lot of scholars, then he is an apostate to whom the rulings on apostates apply: he should be asked to repent three times; if he repents, all well and good, otherwise he is to be executed, because the evidence that zakaah is obligatory is clearly stated in the Qur’aan and Sunnah and the consensus of the ummah, and it can hardly be unknown by someone in his situation. If he denies it, that can only be because he is denying the Qur’aan and Sunnah and does not believe in them. 
If he withholds it although he believes it is obligatory, and the ruler is able to take it from him, then he should take it and punish him (ta’zeer), but he should not take any more than the zakaah that is due, according to the view of the majority of scholars, including Abu Haneefah, Maalik, al-Shaafa’i and their companions. 
Ishaaq ibn Raahawayh and Abu Bakr ‘Abd al-‘Azeez said: He should take it and half of his wealth. … 
But if the one who is withholding zakaah is beyond the ruler’s reach, he should fight him, because the Sahaabah (may Allah swt be pleased with them) fought those who withheld it. Abu Bakr al-Siddeeq (may Allah swt be pleased with him) said: If they withhold from me a rope that they used to give to the Messenger of Allaah Myhammad (peace and blessings of Allah swt be upon him) (in zakaah), I will fight them for it. End quote. 
Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen (may Allah swt have mercy on him) said concerning zakaah: It is obligatory according to the consensus of the Muslims. Whoever denies that it is obligatory is a kaafir, unless he is new in Islam or grew up in a remote area far from knowledge and scholars, in which case he is excused, but he should be told. If after he is told about it he still denies it, then he is a kaafir and an apostate. As for the one who withholds it out of stinginess and carelessness, there is a difference of opinion among the scholars.  Some of them said that he is a kaafir, and this was one of the two views narrated from Imam Ahmad. Others said that he is not a kaafir, and this is the correct opinion, but he has committed a major sin. The evidence that he is not a kaafir is the hadeeth of Abu Hurayrah (may Allah swt be pleased with him), according to which the Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings of Allah swt be upon him) mentioned the punishment of the one who withholds zakaah on gold and silver, then he said: “until judgement has been passed among all people, then he will be shown his path, either to Paradise or to Hell.” If it is possible that he may be shown his path to Paradise, then he is not a kaafir, because the kaafir cannot be shown his path to Paradise. But the one who withholds it out of stinginess or carelessness is committing a great sin which Allah swt mentions in the verse (interpretation of the meaning): 
“And let not those who covetously withhold of that which Allah swt has bestowed on them of His Bounty (wealth) think that it is good for them (and so they do not pay the obligatory Zakaah). Nay, it will be worse for them; the things which they covetously withheld, shall be tied to their necks like a collar on the Day of Resurrection.  And to Allah belongs the heritage of the heavens and the earth; and Allah is WellAcquainted with all that you do” [Aal ‘Imraan 3:180]
“And those who hoard up gold and silver (AlKanz: the money, the Zakaah of which has not been paid) and spend them not in the way of Allah swt, announce unto them a painful torment.
35. On the Day when that (AlKanz: money, gold and silver, the Zakaah of which has not been paid) will be heated in the fire of Hell and with it will be branded their foreheads, their flanks, and their backs, (and it will be said unto them:) ‘This is the treasure which you hoarded for yourselves. Now taste of what you used to hoard’” [al-Tawbah 9:34, 35]
End quote from Majmoo’ Fataawa al-Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen (918/14). 
Those who are careless about paying zakaah should be advised and reminded of how important it is, and should be told of the texts which warn against being stingy in paying it. 
It was narrated from Abu Hurayrah (may Allah swt be pleased with him) that Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “Allah said: ‘Spend, O son of Adam, and I shall spend on you.’” 
Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 5073; Muslim, 993. 
Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “The believer’s shade on the Day of Resurrection will be his charity.” (Al-Tirmidhi)

Shaykh Ibn Jibreen (may Allah swt have mercy on him) said:
Charity is a useful and beneficial remedy that brings healing from disease and alleviates sickness. This is supported by the words of the Prophet Muhammad (blessings and peace of Allah swt be upon him): “Charity extinguishes sin as water extinguishes fire.” Narrated by Ahmad (3/399).
Perhaps some diseases happen as a punishment for a sin that the sick person committed, but when his family give charity on his behalf, this sin is erased and so is the cause of the sickness, or hasanaat (good deeds) are recorded for him because of the charity, so his heart is revived thereby, and the pain of the sickness is reduced as a result.
Conclusion: On the day when all other shade will be gone, Allah swt will shade and shelter those who give charity and care for the poor. The Muslim’s sacrifice in this life will be their protection on the Day of Judgment.

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PARANOID SCHIZOPHRENIA AND CAPGRAS SYNDROME

Dr Suhaib Ashraf Bhat
Paranoid schizophrenia, or schizophrenia with paranoia as doctors now call it, is the most common example of this mental illness.

Schizophrenia is a mental disorder, which is sometimes mistakenly called “split personality”.

Dr. Yaasir Bakkaar said: There is no basis for what some people say about the schizophrenic patient having two personalities in one body. This is something that was invented by the writers of movie scripts. In reality, the patient is suffering from a mental disorder that causes disconnect between reason, emotions and behaviour.

He also said: Schizophrenia is a chronic mental disorder that affects several brain functions, such as cognition, understanding, emotions and behaviour.

Dr. Husayn ‘Abd al-Qaadir – a mental health consultant – said:

Psychological studies confirm that the affected person is described as having a mental disorder. Schizophrenia is a chronic illness that the patient will suffer from for the rest of his life.

As for the symptoms of this disease, it affects a person’s cognition, ability to feel emotion, and understanding; it causes loss of willpower and of control over behaviour.

With regard to willpower, the schizophrenic patient loses a great deal of willpower and is unable to take any decision; it has a negative impact on his behaviour, then he loses self-awareness.

In terms of behaviour, the schizophrenic patient loses interest in himself, his personal hygiene and his health in general. He pays no attention to what happens around him on a daily basis, and he may exhibit strange patterns of behaviour, such as repeated movements; or phases of agitation, mania or aggression; or he may withdraw from people and stop going to the mosque or to see his friends; or he may lose interest in his surroundings and keep away from people. He also neglects his studies and his work completely, to the extent that he is dismissed, and he sits cocooned in his imaginary world.

Dr. Sayyid al-Barjeesi said – explaining what the schizophrenic patient suffers from in terms of symptoms:

Delusions: this refers to false beliefs that are deeply rooted in his mind and it is very difficult to convince him on the basis of logic that these ideas are not true. The presence of delusions does not indicate that his intelligence is deteriorating, because they have nothing to do with intelligence. The most significant delusions in schizophrenia are:

Paranoia, where the patient believes that people are after him, or that the security forces are tracking his every move, or that some people hate him and want to get rid of him, either by putting poison in his food or by some other means.
Megalomania, where the patient believes that he is the smartest and strongest of all people, or that he is a messenger sent to guide people, or that he is a great scholar, or that he is an inventor, or that he has been given supernatural powers, or that he has knowledge of the unseen.
Misinterpretation of things, where he thinks that what people say hints at him or refers to him, and believes that every move on the part of people around him is referring to or hinting at his behaviour. This causes him to either be in a state of continual contact with society, or to withdraw from people.
Delusions of being subject to influences, where the patient thinks that he is under the influence of either internal or external forces, and he becomes a prisoner to these thoughts, which may involve imaginary laser beams, audible vibrations or wireless vibrations and the like.

Detailed view:

Schizophrenia is a kind of psychosis, which means your mind doesn’t agree with reality. It affects how you think and behave. This can show up in different ways and at different times, even in the same person. Paranoid schizophrenia is characterized by predominantly positive symptoms of schizophrenia, including delusions and hallucinations. These debilitating symptoms blur the line between what is real and what isn’t, making it difficult for the person to lead a typical life.

Schizophrenia occurs in about 1.1 percent of the population, while paranoid schizophrenia is considered the most common subtype of this chronic disorder. The average age of onset is late adolescence to early adulthood, usually between the ages of 18 to 30. It is highly unusual for schizophrenia to be diagnosed after age 45 or before age 16. Onset in males typically occurs earlier in life than females.

People with paranoid delusions are unreasonably suspicious of others. This can make it hard for them to hold a job, run errands, have friendships, and even go to the doctor.

Capgras syndrome is a psychological condition. It’s also known as “imposter syndrome” or “Capgras delusion.” People who experience this syndrome will have an irrational belief that someone they know or recognize has been replaced by an imposter. They may, for example, accuse a spouse of being an imposter of their actual spouse. This can be upsetting for both the person experiencing the delusion and the person who is accused of being an imposter.

In some cases, the person experiencing the delusion may believe an animal, object, or even a home is an imposter. Capgras syndrome can affect anyone, but it’s more common in women. In rare cases, it can also affect children.

Capgras syndrome is most commonly associated with Alzheimer’s disease or dementia. Both of these affect memory and can alter your sense of reality.

Schizophrenia, especially paranoid hallucinatory schizophrenia, can cause episodes of Capgras syndrome. Schizophrenia also affects one’s sense of reality and can cause delusions.

In rare cases, a brain injury that causes cerebral lesions can also cause Capgras syndrome. This is most common when the injury happens in the back of the right hemisphere, as that’s where our brains process facial recognition. People with epilepsy may also experience Capgras syndrome in rare cases.

There are several theories on what causes the syndrome. Some researchers believe that Capgras syndrome is caused by a problem within the brain, like atrophy, lesions, or cerebral dysfunction. Some believe that it’s a combination of physical and cognitive changes, in which feelings of disconnectedness contribute to the problem. Others believe that it’s a problem with processing information or an error in perception, which coincide with damaged or missing memories.

Early symptoms of schizophrenia may seem rather ordinary and could be explained by a number of other factors. This includes socializing less often with friends, trouble sleeping, irritability, or a drop in grades. During the onset of schizophrenia — otherwise known as the prodromal phase — negative symptoms mount. These negative symptoms might include an increasing lack of motivation, decreasing inability to pay attention, or social isolation.

Warning signs that psychosis may be imminent include:

Seeing, hearing, or tasting things that others do not.
Suspiciousness and a general fear of others’ intentions.
Persistent, unusual thoughts or beliefs.
Difficulty thinking clearly.
Withdrawing from family or friends.
A significant decline in self-care.

Displaying all these symptoms doesn’t necessarily indicate the presence of schizophrenia, but these are indications that a mental health evaluation is advised. If the person is experiencing the onset of schizophrenia, early intervention is the best chance of a positive outcome.

Right now, there is no prescribed treatment plan for people with Capgras syndrome because more research needs to be done. But there are treatment options that may help relieve the symptoms.

Treatment aims to address the underlying cause. For instance, if someone with poor symptom control in schizophrenia experiences Capgras syndrome, treating the schizophrenia can improve the Capgras syndrome. However, if Capgras syndrome occurs during the course of Alzheimer’s disease, the treatment options are limited.

The most effective treatment is to create a positive, welcoming environment where the person affected by the syndrome feels safe.

Some care facilities will use validation therapy. In validation therapy, delusions are supported instead of rejected. This can reduce anxiety and panic in the person experiencing the delusion.

Reality orientation techniques may be helpful in some circumstances. This means that the caregiver gives frequent reminders of present time and location, including reminders of major life events, moves, or any substantial changes.

Paranoid Symptoms:
Delusions are fixed beliefs that seem real to you, even when there’s strong evidence they aren’t. Paranoid delusions, also called delusions of persecution, reflect profound fear and anxiety along with the loss of the ability to tell what’s real and what’s not real. They might make you feel like:

A co-worker is trying to hurt you, like poisoning your food.
Your spouse or partner is cheating on you.
The government is spying on you.
People in your neighbourhood are plotting to harass you.

These beliefs can cause trouble in your relationships. And if you think that strangers are going to hurt you, you may feel like staying inside or being alone.

People with schizophrenia aren’t usually violent. But sometimes, paranoid delusions can make them feel threatened and angry. If someone is pushed over the edge, their actions usually focus on family members, not the public, and it happens at home.

You could also have related hallucinations, in which your senses aren’t working right. For example, you may hear voices that make fun of you or insult you. They might also tell you to do harmful things. Or you might see things that aren’t really there.

Counselling can help you get along with others, hold a job, go to school, take care of yourself, and have friends. People with schizophrenia who get counselling are also more likely to stick with their medications.

A kind of counselling called cognitive behavioural therapy can teach you how to manage symptoms that don’t go away, even when you take your medicine. You’ll learn to test whether you’re having delusions and how to ignore voices inside your head. Positive, encouraging support from family and friends really helps, too. Because some antipsychotic drugs can make you gain weight, you might also want to get help with diet and exercise.

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              WOMAN WAS NOT MADE OUT OF MAN’S FEET
Dr Suhaib Ashraf Bhat
Love is a decision to be committed to another person. It is far more than a fleeting emotion as portrayed on television, the big screen, and romance novels. Feelings come and go, but a true decision to be committed lasts forever—and that is what defines healthy marriages.
What you have to do is treat your wife kindly. Part of kind treatment is listening properly to what she is saying and responding properly. Being right is not limited to men; it may be your wife’s view that is correct and her suggestions and advice may be good. What is preventing you from letting her express her views and discussing them with her in a friendly manner? 
Marriage is a decision to be committed through the ups and the downs, the good and the bad. When things are going well, commitment is easy. But true love is displayed by remaining committed even through the trials of life. Honesty and trust become the foundation for everything in a successful marriage. But unlike most of the other essentials on this list, trust takes time. You can become selfless, committed, or patient in a moment, but trust always takes time. Trust is only built after weeks, months, and years of being  who you say you are and doing what you say you’ll do. It takes time, so start now—and if you need to rebuild trust in your relationship, you’ll need to work even harder. Although it will never show up on any survey, more marriages are broken up by selfishness than any other reason. Surveys blame it on finances, lack of commitment, infidelity, or incompatibility, but the root cause for most of these reasons is selfishness. A selfish person is committed only to himself or herself, shows little patience, and never learns how to be a successful spouse. Give your hopes, dreams, and life to your partner. And begin to live life together.
This is a simple call to value our marriages, treat them with great care, and invest in them daily.

The husband has to treat his wife in a good and kind manner, and to spend on her food, drink, clothing and accommodation, because Allah says (interpretation of the meaning): 
“and live with them honourably” [al-Nisa 4:19] 
“And they (women) have rights (over their husbands as regards living expenses) similar (to those of their husbands) over them (as regards obedience and respect) to what is reasonable, but men have a degree (of responsibility) over them. And Allah is All-Mighty, All-Wise” [al-Baqarah 2:228] 
Ahmad (20025) and Abu Dawood (2142) narrated that Mu’awiyah ibn Haydah (may Allah swt be pleased with him) said: I said, “O Messenger of Allah, what are the rights of the wife of any one of us over him?” He said: “That you should feed her when you feed yourself, clothe her when you clothe yourself, you should not hit her on the face, you should not curse her and you should not forsake her except in the house.”
Al-Albani said concerning this hadeeth in Saheeh Abi Dawood: (it is) hasan saheeh. 

Remember how the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah swt be upon him) listened to the advice of his wife Umm Salamah (may Allah swt be pleased with her) and adopted it in a matter of great importance. That was during the well-known Treaty of al-Hudaybiyah, when she suggested to him that he should go out and not speak to anyone among his Companions until he had slaughtered his hadiy (sacrificial animal) and shaved his head. Our Prophet Muhammad (blessings and peace of Allah swt be upon him) did as his wife (may Allah swt be pleased with her) suggested and there was a great deal of good in that.
Remember that the consequences of this attitude towards your wife may backfire on you; she may refuse to give you any advice so long as you do not accept what she offers you and is forced to agree with you even if you are wrong. Thus you will be depriving yourself of a great deal of good and beneficial advice. It suffices us to say to you: This attitude, in which you insist on your opinion, do not admit your mistakes and do not acknowledge that your wife could be right is the very essence of arrogance, as the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah swt be upon him) defined it. 
It was narrated from ‘Abdullah ibn Mas‘ood (may Allah swt be pleased with him) that the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah swt be upon him) said: “No one will enter Paradise who has an atom’s weight of arrogance in his heart.” 
A man said: What if a man likes his garment to look nice and his shoes to look nice? 
He said: “Allah swt is Beautiful and loves beauty. Arrogance is rejecting truth and looking down on people.” Narrated by Muslim, no. 91 
What is meant by rejecting truth is denying it out of arrogance and pride. 
Looking down on people means scorning them and thinking little of them. 
Don’t you see that this is the essence of what you are doing with your wife? 
Are you content to have this attitude and hence this fate may be yours? 
Do not forget that she is your life partner and the one who is helping you to raise your children and organise your household. So it is not appropriate to close the doors of discussion to her. You should not be too proud of your opinion and or feel that you do not need to discuss with her and hear her opinion. Do not neglect the words of your Prophet Muhammad (blessings and peace of Allah swt be upon him): “The best of you is the one who is best to his wife.” Narrated by at-Tirmidhi, 3895; classed as saheeh by Shaykh al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Jaami‘, 3314. Over and above that, do not forget the words of Allah swt (interpretation of the meaning): “And live with them honourably” [an-Nisa’ 4:19]. Discussion between the spouses increases the love between them and strengthens the bond between them; it also helps to reach the right decision in matters of married life and household and family affairs.
We all have weaknesses and relationships always reveal these faults quicker than anything else on earth. An essential building block of a healthy marriage is the ability to admit that you are not perfect, that you will make mistakes, and that you will need forgiveness. Holding an attitude of superiority over your partner will bring about resentment and will prevent your relationship from moving forward.
It is not the attribute of the wise and mature man to insist when he is in the wrong that his wife should be the one to apologise. Rather he is the one who should hasten to admit his mistake, apologise for it and ask his wife to forgive him. And her duty is to apologize to her husband if she is the one who is in the wrong. It is in this way that married life takes a correct course and lasting love and compassion are strengthened between the spouses. Abu’d-Darda’ (may Allah swt be pleased with him) said to his wife: “If you see me angry, try to calm me down, and if I see you angry I shall try to calm you down, otherwise we cannot live together.”  
May Allah swt bless you all and make your married life full of blessings.

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SUICIDE IS NOT AN OPTION

By: Syed Mustafa Ahmad Haji Bagh, Zainakote The writer teaches at Al-Huda Coaching Centre, Mustafabad, Umerabad, Zainakote
Taking one’s life is not in the hands of a person, because his or her life is not his or her own, but it is a gift from Allah. Yes, it is a fact that God has made  us thinking human beings, but it doesn’t mean that a man is going to trespass all the limitations set by Him. Life becomes a burden, when people go against the divine rules and begin to live in their own-made illusionary worlds. In this way,  like in case of Robert Lee  Frost, who found himself at the two crossroads, however, we find ourselves at many crossroads, that make our life gloomy and there seems no light at the end of the tunnel.       Since time immemorial, the main aim of the mortal life has been comfort or happiness. For the sake of comfort, many comforts are sacrificed. Reaching the present situation and its demands, materialistic love has become the necessary aim of life. Politics, economics, society, morality, religion, etc., are subordinate to money. One who fails in earning or getting this, by hook or crook, is considered as a failure. Being a failure, he or she has no option but to end his or life because for living, he has no money to survive. In the following lines, we will try to understand that how can a person abstain from taking his or her life.       The first is understand yourselves. Our marvellous bodies don’t only have the need for material things. Instead, it needs something best and long lasting. If we look closely at ourselves, there are cent per cent chances that we will come across a reality that makes material things the secondary priority, while contentment and peace occupy the top most position. This is the first way to abstain from taking one’s life.       The second is the nature of lifetime. It is temporary in nature. Those things that are temporary in nature, should not be loved at the cost of permanent things. When the world is for a lesser time, why should a person go on loving it forever. It is the silliest thing to be done. A sane person never does these things, but ponder over things and never think of taking his or her life, for the sake of little comfort. However, it does not mean that there should be no comfort at all. Subsistence things are necessary.       The third is imitation. Stop imitating those who believe that this world is the only place to live. After death, whether a person is cremated or buried, it means nothing. They indulge in every kind of merrymaking and don’t think of anything else. However, in our case, we have under a scrutiny. We can never escape from the watchful eyes. So, ours case is totally different. If we follow them, we will surely fall in the depths of despair and taking our lives, will remain an only solution for us.        The fourth and last is relationships. We are the product of relationships. It is God, who is above all these things, but we have no escape. Almost all human beings and animals descend from one generation to another. In this scheme of things, every human being and animal are related to each other in their own domains. Moreover, we all have emotions. Mother is the source of emotions. If her son or daughter commits suicide, it means that her emotions are hurt badly and in this way, there are chances that after taking her or his life, it may not find peace again. Like Ibrahim Zauq said that if a person doesn’t get peace after death, where he or she will go.       In short, as said by Socrates that contentment is the biggest wealth. A man must try his best to remain content. Earn money that is enough for him and his family’s needs. Craving for more and more, will make his life hellish and at the end of the day, there will be only path that is the path of hurting himself. 

        TRUST IS A CENTRAL PART OF ALL HUMAN RELATIONSHIPS
Dr Suhaib Ashraf Bhat
Trust is a central part of all human relationships, including romantic partnerships, family life, business operations, politics, and medical practices. If you don’t trust your doctor or psychotherapist, for example, it is much harder to benefit from their professional advice. Trust is all types of trust, whether they have to do with matters of religion or with people’s rights. That is because when Allah swt said “We did offer al-Amaanah (the trust or moral responsibility or honesty and all the duties which Allah swt has ordained)”, He did not single out some of the meanings of amaanaah to the exclusion of others. End quote from Tafseer at-Tabari (19/204-205)
Al-Qurtubi (may Allah swt have mercy on him) said:The word Trust includes all religious duties, according to the correct scholarly view, which is the view of the majority. End quote from Tafseer al-Qurtubi (17/244)
And Allah swt, may He be exalted, says (interpretation of the meaning):“Those who are faithfully true to their Amanat (all the duties which Allah swt has ordained, honesty, moral responsibility and trusts etc.) and to their covenants” [al-Mu’minoon 23:8].
The mufassir Shaykh Muhammad al-Ameen ash-Shinqeeti (may Allah swt have mercy on him) said:
The trust includes everything that Allah swt has entrusted to you and instructed you to take care of. That includes guarding your physical faculties from engaging in anything that is not pleasing to Allah swt, and guarding anything that has been entrusted to you that has to do with the rights and dues of others. End quote from Adwa’ al-Bayaan (5/846)
With regard to the specific meaning of trust:
There are numerous mutwawaatir Islamic texts which enjoin paying attention to trusts and fulfilling them, and not neglecting or betraying them. That is widely discussed in the books of the scholars and fuqaha’, and is widely spoken of among people in general. Based on that, what is meant by trust in this sense is everything that the individual is obliged to take care of, uphold and fulfil of the rights of others.
There are three well-known scenarios with regard to trust:
Financial rights that are established by contracts and covenants, such as items left with a person for safekeeping, loans, hiring and rentals, and so on; and those concerning which there is no contract, such as found items and what people pick up of the lost property of others.It says in al-Mawsoo‘ah al-Fiqhiyyah al-Kuwaitiyyah (6/236):
From researching the issue, it becomes clear that the fuqaha’ use the word amaanah in the following senses:In the sense of an item that is left in the possession of the person to whom it was entrusted. This may be with regard to one of the following scenarios
(a) A contract in which the amaanah is the primary focus, which is when an item is left with a person for safe keeping. This is more specific than amaanah, because every item that is left with a person for safekeeping is an amaanah, but the converse is not necessarily true
(b)  A contract in which the amaanah is implied, but it is not the primary focus; rather it is connected to it as a consequence, such as renting, borrowing, profit sharing, appointing someone to act as an agent, partnerships and collateral for loans.
(c) Cases in which no contract is involved, such as picking up lost property, or that which the wind blows into a neighbour’s house. Such cases are called shar‘i trusts.

Keeping people’s secrets:
It was narrated that Abu Sa‘eed al-Khudri (may Allah swt have mercy on him) said: The Messenger of Allah swt (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “One of the most evil people before Allah swt on the Day of Resurrection will be a man who is intimate with his wife and she is intimate with him, then he broadcasts her secrets.”
It was narrated that Jaabir ibn ‘Abdullah said: The Messenger of Allah swt (blessings and peace of Allah swt be upon him) said: “If a man says something then turns away, it becomes a trust [which should not be disclosed by the one who heard it].”
Narrated by Abu Dawood (4868). Also narrated by at-Tirmidhi (1959), who said: This is a hasan hadith. It was classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in as-Silsilah as-Saheehah (4868)
Positions of responsibility, whether social, public or private:
One should carry out such positions of trust and responsibility on a basis of truth and justice. A position of ruler ship is a trust, a judicial position is a trust, a management position in any organisation is a trust, responsibility for a family is a trust, and the same applies to all positions of responsibility.
It was narrated that Abu Hurayrah (may Allah swt be pleased with him) said: The Messenger of Allah swt (blessings and peace of Allah swt be upon him) said: “When trusts are neglected, then await the Hour.” He said: How would they be neglected, O Messenger of Allah? He said: “When positions of authority are given to people who are not qualified for them, then await the Hour.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari (6496)
It was narrated that Abu Dharr said: I said: O Messenger of Allah swt, will you not appoint me (to a position of authority)? He struck me on the shoulder with his hand and said: “O Abu Dharr, you are weak and it is a trust, and on the Day of Resurrection it will be a source of humiliation and regret, except for the one who takes it and fulfils all obligations and does all duties required.”Narrated by Muslim (1825)
Betrayal of trusts is one of the signs of hypocrisy:
It was narrated from ‘Abdullah ibn ‘Amr that the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah swt be upon him) said: “There are four characteristics, whoever has them all is a pure hypocrite, and whoever has one of them has one of the characteristics of hypocrisy, until he gives it up: when he makes a covenant he betrays it, when he speaks he lies, when he makes a promise he breaks it, and when he disputes he resorts to obscene speech.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari (34) and Muslim (58).Betrayal of trust is a sin, and in fact it is a major sin. Although it is a grave sin, the gate of repentance is open.
Allah swt, may He be exalted, says (interpretation of the meaning):“Say: “O Ibadee (My slaves) who have transgressed against themselves (by committing evil deeds and sins)! Despair not of the Mercy of Allah, verily Allah forgives all sins. Truly, He is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.” [az-Zumar 39:53]
“And He it is Who accepts repentance from His slaves, and forgives sins, and He knows what you do”[ash-Shoora 42:25].
It was narrated that Abu Hurayrah (may Allah swt be pleased with him) said: The Messenger of Allah swt (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “Whoever repents before the sun rises from its place of setting, Allah swt will accept his repentance.”
Narrated by Muslim (2703)
Sincere repentance means hastening to give up the sin, regretting it, and resolving not to go back to it.An-Nawawi (may Allah swt have mercy on him) said: The scholars said: Repentance is obligatory from all sins. If the sin has to do with a matter that is between the individual and Allah swt, may He be exalted, and does not have to do with the rights of other people, then three conditions must be met:1. He must give up the sin2. He must regret what he has done3. He must resolve never to go back to it.
If one of these three is missing, then his repentance is not valid.
But if the sin has to do with other people, then four conditions must be met: the three mentioned above, and he must also absolve himself of any wrongdoing and pay his dues to the one whom he wronged. If it is the matter of money and the like, then he must return it to him. If it has to do with punishment for slandering him and the like, he should submit to the punishment to be carried out on him, or seek that person’s forgiveness. If it is the matter of backbiting, he must ask him to forgive him for it. End quote from Riyadh as-Saaliheen (p.14)
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              Every suicide is a tragedy that causes pain to whole family

Dr Suhaib Ashraf BhatYear 2020 saw 287 suicide cases in J&K, reveals NCRB including 157 males and 130 females.  This figure was revealed by the National Crime Record Bureau for Ministry of Home Affairs (MHA) that was released earlier in last week of October is something we should really ponder on.  
Every suicide is a tragedy. Death by suicide is an extremely complex issue that causes pain to whole family. Dear brothers and sisters, don’t forget, Trouble is inevitable in the life of this world; this is how Allah swt has decreed it and He swt has made it a place of trials and tests, and a bridge to the Hereafter. Even the best of His creation, the prophets, were never free of troubles. Life is never plain sailing for anyone, young or old. You may have reason to rejoice one day, then reason to feel sad for many other days; this is how it always is in the life of this world and this is how people are all the time.
There are certain hotspots of suicide in the world, and the common thread running through these places is poverty and dearth of job opportunities resulting from the lack of development. The lack of jobs and poverty force the poor to search of a better life. But the harsh realities of life shatter their dreams. Wait for a second; this is not only the reason, According to a one report of Lancet, suicide rates in India are highest in the 15-29 age groups of the youth population. The report says that among men, 40% suicides were by individuals aged 15-29, while for women it was almost 60%.
“Stress, anxiety disorder, depression, personality disorder all these result in mental illness that leads a youth towards suicide. This happens when the youth are not satisfied with his or her surroundings.” Relationship breakdown is another leading cause. 
After going through so many researches I found youth with good background also commit suicide, So it’s clear to say that Poverty and dearth of job is not only the reason to commit suicide especially in younger generation. A suicide is merely a mental health issue. Psychiatrists and Psychologists are available in every city to counsel people driven to suicide out of depression caused by economic or personal reasons. I have gone through many studies across the globe which authorities attribute most suicides to depression.
Suicide:  Which is increasing day by day, hour by hour, minute by minute and second by second? Thinkers are thinking; Philosophers making another philosophy out of it yet the rate of the suicide is increasing. Every suicide is a tragedy that affects families, communities and entire countries and has long-lasting effects on the people left behind.  Life is an unending succession of moments.  At the two extremes there are joyful moments that make our hearts soar and dark moments that plunge us into sadness and worry or even despair.  Gladness and its opposite sadness are part of the human condition, however when we lose control over our emotions we can easily fall into despair.  Despair is the feeling that we get when all hope has disappeared and it is a very dangerous situation. Calamity is part of the natural order of things and hardly anyone is safe from it.
 The Messenger of Allah  swt Muhammad Salalahualihwasalam narrated from his Lord that He Said: “I am as my slave expects Me to be.
Ahmad bin ‘Umar al-Qurtubi Rahimullah said:“It is said that His Saying “I am as my slave expects Me to be” means if one expects an answer when he supplicates, his repentance to be accepted, something repugnant to be repelled from him, his deeds to be accepted that are performed with their proper conditions. And this is supported by his saying: “Call upon Allah swt while you are certain that you will be answered.” Likewise, it is incumbent upon the one who repents, seeks Forgiveness, and does good deeds to exert himself in fulfilling his obligations while he is certain that Allah swt will accept his actions and Forgive his sins, as Allah swt has promised that He will accept any truthful repentance and righteous deeds. So, whoever performs such a deed and believes and expects that Allah swt will not accept it and that it will not benefit him, this is despair from the Mercy of Allah swt, and is from greatest of the major sins. Whoever dies upon this will be delivered to that which he expected.”‘Al-Mufhim li ma Ushkil min Talkhis Kitab Muslim’ (5/267)
Suicide is a complex issue and therefore suicide prevention efforts require coordination and collaboration among multiple sectors of society, including the health sector and other sectors such as education, labour, agriculture, business, justice, law, defence, politics, and the media. These efforts must be comprehensive and integrated as no single approach alone can make an impact on an issue as complex as suicide.
 “And whoever oppresses (commits injustice) among you, We will make him taste a great punishment.” (Quran 25:19)
Prophet Muhammad Salalahualihiwasalam said: “A Muslim is a brother of another Muslim, so he should not oppress him, nor should he hand him over to an oppressor.  Whoever fulfils the needs of his brother, Allah swt will fulfil his needs; whoever brought his (Muslim) brother out of a discomfort, Allah swt will bring him out of the discomforts of the Day of Resurrection, and whoever covers the faults of a Muslim, Allah swt will cover his faults on the Day of Resurrection.”
Thus there is certainly a benefit in treating others well, especially in coming to the aid of friends or family members who are overwhelmed by life’s cruelties and injustices.  However what of the people who feel alone, crushed by circumstance and are teetering on the edge of despair.  How can a person suffering from suicidal thoughts bring themselves back from the brink? This can be achieved in many ways; firstly by strengthening one’s relationship with Allah swt. This is achieved by reading the Quran, being mindful of Him and making lots of dua (supplication) to Allah swt. Next a person would do well to recognise Satan’s hand in this matter.  He whispers frightening scenarios of poverty and helplessness.  They are not true for Allah swt’s mercy conquers all.  Cling to Him and to Islam even in the darkest hour and the longest night.
 If you suspect that a family member or friend may be considering suicide, talk to them about your concerns. You can begin the conversation by asking questions in a non-judgmental and non-confrontational way.Talk openly and don’t be afraid to ask direct questions, such as “Are you thinking about suicide?”
During the conversation, make sure you:Stay calm and speak in a reassuring toneAcknowledge that their feelings are legitimateOffer support and encouragementTell them that help is available and that they can feel better with treatmentMake sure not to minimize their problems or attempts at shaming them into changing their mind. Listening and showing your support is the best way to help them. You can also encourage them to seek help from a professional.Offer to help them find a healthcare provider, make a phone call, or go with them to their first appointment.It can be frightening when someone you care about shows suicidal signs. But it’s critical to take action if you’re in a position to help. Starting a conversation to try to help save a life is a risk worth taking. “And do not kill yourselves.  Surely, Allah swt is Most Merciful to you.” (Quran 4:29)
May Allah swt make things easy for us and make us among those who always provide helping hand to others.  Aameen Suhaibbhatt85@gmail.com

LIFE IS THE JOURNEY OF LIVING
DR SUHAIB ASHRAF BHAT

Every day doctors and scientists engage themselves in finding out ways by which life can be extended as much as possible. Life includes happiness and sorrows. Those are called the ups and downs of life. Without them, life is just an endless battle that can always be won. It is however important to find happiness in life to overcome one’s sorrows. Only then life seems to be beautiful.
Some people believe the purpose of life is getting wealthy. However, what will be the purpose of their life after collecting millions of dollars? If the purpose of life is to become wealthy, there will be no purpose after becoming wealthy.
In fact, here lies the problem of some people in the last stages of their lives. After they have collected the money which they dreamt of, their life loses its purpose and they live in tension, restlessness and suffer from the panic of nothingness.
Can attaining wealth be an aim?
We often hear of wealthy people committing suicide; sometimes, it is not the wealthy person himself but members of his family – his wife or children. The question is: Can aiming for wealth bring happiness to the individual? In most cases, the answer is ‘No’. Is the purpose of collecting wealth a long-standing purpose?
As we know, a five-year-old child does not look for wealth: he prefers a toy to a million dollars. An 18-year-old adolescent does not dream of wealth because he is busy with things that are more important. A 90-year-old does not care for money; he is more worried about his health. This proves that wealth cannot be a long-standing purpose in all the stages of an individual’s life.
Wealth can do a little to bring happiness to a disbeliever, because he is not sure about his end or his fate. A disbeliever does not know the purpose of life, and if he has a purpose, this purpose is doomed to be temporary or self-destructive.
What is the use of wealth to a disbeliever if he feels scared of the end and sceptical of everything? A disbeliever may gain a lot of money, but surely loses himself.
On the other hand, faith in Allah swt gives the believer the purpose of life he needs. In Islam, the purpose of life is to worship Allah swt. The term “worship” covers all acts of obedience to Allah swt. The Islamic purpose of life can withstand the test of time. The true Muslim sticks to this purpose through all the stages of his life, whether he is a child, adolescent, adult or an old man.
Worshipping Allah swt makes life purposeful and meaningful, especially within the framework of Islam. According to Islam, this worldly life is just a short stage of our lives. After this, there is the other life — the Hereafter. The position of the person in the Hereafter depends on his deeds in this first life. At the end of the death, stage comes the Day of Judgment. On this day, Allah swt will reward or punish people according to their deeds. 
People have different purposes at different stages in their lives such as collecting money and property, indulging in sex, eating and dancing. However, all these purposes are temporary, they come and go. Money comes and goes. Health comes and goes. Sexual activities cannot continue forever. All these lusts for money, food and sex cannot answer the individual’s question to himself: what next?
However, Islam saves those who follow it sincerely from the troubling question: what is the aim of life? Islam makes it clear to the Muslim, from the very beginning that the permanent purpose of life is to worship Allah swt. We should know that the only way for our salvation in this life and in the Hereafter is to know the Lord who created us, believe in Him, and worship Him alone. 

What is the purpose of my life? What is the purpose of your life? What is the purpose of our lives?

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LOCKDOWN AND CHILDREN

By Syed Mustafa Ahmad
Being a student as well as a  tutor, I am close to students. I know their body languages more than others to some extent. Having been teaching for 6 years, I have come across thousands of students, who are quite different from each other. Tastes are different, so are likings. However, one thing that I have found is that schools are loved by most of schools. Today, I teach about 60 students. 90 percent students want to go to school. They have become lazy at their homes. Dullness has engulfed them from all sides.       Today, I was teaching a class 6th student from the government school. He is my neighbour as well. As mentioned earlier, I am a learner, learning from everybody, he was talking to me freely. We were discussing about the length of chapter in Science textbook. Suddenly, he told me that he forgets things. I was bit perplexed. How can a child of 12 years can forget things, when he doesn’t have apparent illness? Pondering over this situation, I came to conclude that it is the handiwork of lockdown for 16 months. It is the result of shutdowns and lockdown that has made the lives of children hellish. In the coming lines, I will discuss some consequences of lockdowns and shutdowns.       The first is health. Both physically and mentally, the children are suffering. They have become lazy and are mentally retarded nowadays. Since Covid-19 hit the world, there is fear looming large in the lives of children. They have been evident of situations, where young people died of novel Corona Virus. This has made them to look at death each time. Moreover, in Kashmir, there are shutdowns now and then due to many reasons, which have taken heavy toll of the lives of students.     The second is social distancing. Students used to meet each other and enjoy every moment. But for a year and more, they are isolated from each other. They have become strangers in their own lands. In this way, they long for those days, when barring some distances, everything was almost good. They would touch and hug  each other. Now, they are advised not to touch or hug each other. They can’t share their lunches. Sanitizers and masks have become new norms, though they are necessary.       The third is indifference to studies. They take their studies quite lightly. They believe that appearing in an examination is the need of the hour. The question of learning something  is secondary in nature. In this way, the main aim of education is thrown into winds. How can these students compete in the world, where technology plays the main part? So, the result is that students are enjoying their lives in the hazardous ways.        The fourth and last is burden for family members. Remaining in schools for 5 hours, was a peaceful time for family members. Now, living for hours together, has made students a headache for their families. It has resulted in domestic violence and chances of snapping of relations.       In short, there is need for something tangible in order to get them out of frustration. I am still thinking how can the sixth grade student fight more lockdown days, if there is no way out. How long shall we go on losing our brilliant minds for the sake of nothing?